Well, I'll warn you now. This section is the usual random collection of boring biographical information on the person who made this website (yes, that would be me. no, there aren't any prizes). Specific interests and all that junk are all linked from my main page. In addition, much of the content hasn't been updated since I was in my early 20s in the late 90s / early 00s, so... um, angst ahoy?

But first, a manifesto:

I am capable of rearranging the fundamental building blocks of the universe in under six seconds with enough time left over to move 30 feet. I am capable of manipulating matter and energy on a subatomic level by speaking. A mere flick of my finger is sufficient to alter the gravitational pull of the planet. I shelve physics texts under "Fiction" in my personal library. I consider the Laws of Thermodynamics loose guidelines at best. In short, I am grasping the reins of the universe's carriage, and every morning I wake up, look to the heavens, and shout, "Giddy up, boy!" You may never grasp the complexities of what I do, but at least have the courtesy to feign something other than slack-jawed oblivion in my presence.

I, sir, am a wizard, and I break more natural laws before breakfast than of which you are even aware.

Contact me at laeren at gmail.com if you're so inclined, and if you're a person that knows me, Facebook may be of interest.